Archive-Date: Mon, 05 Feb 2001 15:35:46 -0700 Sender: owner-mad-scientists@VJC.COM Message-ID: <388634805.981412435207.JavaMail.root@web569-mc> Date: Mon, 5 Feb 2001 17:33:55 -0500 (EST) From: "Dr. Attembaum" Reply-To: Mad-Scientists@Mad-Scientists.ORG To: Mad-Scientists@Mad-Scientists.ORG Subject: RE: I'm famous due to Mad Scientists!!! MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Greetings. I am having a problem obtaining the search results you seem to be speaking of. When I click the link Geneva provided, I just get a listing of genealogy sites mostly, and a few other pages that don't seem relevant. When I do a search for my own name, I find some company somewhere which happens to share my name (and more genealogy sites). But I don't see anything here that makes us "famous." I am wondering what it is, precisely, that I am supposed to be finding with this search... Dr Attembaum Atomic Squid Industries Washington, USA (PS: This message may have been duplicated due to technical difficulties I was experiencing with this silly email program.) ------Original Message------ From: Gneevah@aol.com To: Mad-Scientists@Mad-Scientists.ORG Sent: January 26, 2001 7:17:49 PM GMT Subject: I'm famous due to Mad Scientists!!! check out this link, then go to google and check you name in the search, we're all famous now!!! good luck, geneva Click here: Google Search: geneva milbourne http://kang.mad-scientists.org/madsci/members.html http://directory.google.com/ ______________________________________________ FREE Personalized Email at Mail.com Sign up at http://www.mail.com/?sr=signup ================================================================================ Archive-Date: Tue, 06 Feb 2001 09:26:50 -0700 Sender: owner-mad-scientists@VJC.COM Message-ID: <389266769.981472521200.JavaMail.root@web149-mc> Date: Tue, 6 Feb 2001 10:15:21 -0500 (EST) From: "Dr. Attembaum" Reply-To: Mad-Scientists@Mad-Scientists.ORG To: Mad-Scientists@Mad-Scientists.ORG Subject: RE: I'm famous due to Mad Scientists!!! MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Hello again. Hmm, well never mind. I looked again and spent a little more time reading the results of the search and found what Geneva was talking about on the seventh page of ten pages of search results. I guess I gave up too easily before. DOH! Dr Attembaum ------Original Message------ From: Gneevah@aol.com To: Mad-Scientists@Mad-Scientists.ORG Sent: January 26, 2001 7:17:49 PM GMT Subject: I'm famous due to Mad Scientists!!! check out this link, then go to google and check you name in the search, we're all famous now!!! good luck, geneva Click here: Google Search: geneva milbourne http://kang.mad-scientists.org/madsci/members.html http://directory.google.com/ ______________________________________________ FREE Personalized Email at Mail.com Sign up at http://www.mail.com/?sr=signup ================================================================================ Archive-Date: Tue, 06 Feb 2001 16:49:57 -0700 Sender: owner-mad-scientists@VJC.COM Message-ID: <200102061043120400.00C3582A@smtp-server.austin.rr.com> References: <389266769.981472521200.JavaMail.root@web149-mc> Date: Tue, 06 Feb 2001 10:43:12 -0600 Reply-To: MAD-SCIENTISTS@VJC.COM From: "Edwin Wise" To: Mad-Scientists@Mad-Scientists.ORG Subject: RE: I'm famous due to Mad Scientists!!! Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" Bwa-ha-haa-ahaaaa! I'm ALL SORTS of FAMOUS! My PLANS for WORLD DOMINATION are progressing nicely! Google search for my ego: Edwin Wise My projects: Fuzbol (not the football one; they steal my name!), or Project Boris Even on amazon.com: Edwin Wise, or even Robotics! All PAWNS in my PLANS TO RULE! Bwa-ha-haa-ahaaaa! ... sorry. I couldn't help myself. Edwin -- Edwin Wise (ewise@simreal.com) Mad Scientist Simulated Reality Systems, LLC http://www.simreal.com ================================================================================ Archive-Date: Fri, 16 Feb 2001 08:43:56 -0700 Sender: owner-mad-scientists@VJC.COM From: jgt Reply-To: Mad-Scientists@Mad-Scientists.ORG To: Mad-Scientists@mad-scientists.org Subject: Study of Usenet trolls Date: Fri, 16 Feb 2001 06:12:56 -0600 Content-Type: text/plain MIME-Version: 1.0 Message-ID: <01021606125600.01230@localhost.localdomain> Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit I have engaged in a recent study of a particular sub-branch of the usenet "troll". What seems most interesting is that "trollishness" appears to be contagious. While various theories were banded about, from troll reproduction to viral infection, I myself have realised that the only thing that truely fits the facts is a memetic infection. A memetic infection would explain their reproductive process while explaining why perfectly reasonable people who also have low memetic imunities can be reduced to gibbering idiots after heavy exposure as well as the only known treatment, full isolation. Of course until a dissection is performed we cannot be FULLY sure whether it is memetic, or physical. I recommend aquiring a specimen for full dissection and analysis at once. If this sort of thing can be fully identified then defenses can be put into place and perhaps be utilized against similar possible infectious memes, or whatever the cause may turn out to be. I will continue my studies as soon as I can. ================================================================================ Archive-Date: Fri, 16 Feb 2001 15:34:03 -0700 Sender: owner-mad-scientists@VJC.COM Message-ID: <005b01c09868$889c4fa0$0400a8c0@p3800> From: "I. W. H. MacLeod" Reply-To: Mad-Scientists@Mad-Scientists.ORG To: "Mad Scientists" Subject: Ways to have fun in the computer lab Date: Fri, 16 Feb 2001 16:33:49 -0600 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_NextPart_000_0058_01C09836.3D8AB3D0" This is a multi-part message in MIME format. ------=_NextPart_000_0058_01C09836.3D8AB3D0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable Fellow Mad Scientists, We've all been working too hard, now is the time to have some fun: 50 Ways To Confuse, Worry, Or Just Scare People In A Computer Lab 1.Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and = scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.=20 2.Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and = look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.=20 3.When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty = that you can't get the damn thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, = wait 5 minutes,turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half = hour.=20 4.Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you = evily.=20 5.Before anyone else is in the lab, connect each computer to a = different screen than the one it's set up with.=20 6.Write a program that plays the "Smurfs" theme song and play it at = the highest volume possible over & over again.=20 7.Work normally for a while. Suddenly look amazingly startled by = something on the screen and crawl underneath the desk.=20 8.Ask the person next to you if they know how to tap into top-secret = Pentagon files.=20 9.Use Interactive Send to make passes at people you don't know.=20 10.Make a small ritual sacrifice to the computer before you turn it on. = 11.Bring a chainsaw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why you have it, = say "Just in case..." mysteriously.=20 12.Type on VAX for a while. Suddenly start cursing for 3 minutes at = everything bad about your life. Then stop and continue typing.=20 13.Enter the lab, undress, and start staring at other people as if = they're crazy while typing.=20 14.Light candles in a pentagram around your terminal before starting.=20 15.Ask around for a spare disk. Offer $2. Keep asking until someone = agrees. Then, pull a disk out of your fly and say, "Oops, I forgot."=20 16.Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, = pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES!" when it = finishes.=20 17."DISK FIGHT!!!"=20 18.Start making out with the person at the terminal next to you (It = helps if you know them, but this is also a great way to make new = friends).=20 19.Put a straw in your mouth and put your hands in your pockets. Type = by hitting the keys with the straw.=20 20.If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion = Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required.=20 21.Draw a pictue of a woman (or man) on a piece of paper, tape it to = your monitor. Try to seduce it. Act like it hates you and then complain = loudly that women (men) are worthless.=20 22.Try to stick a Ninetendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disk drive. When = it doesn't work, get the supervisor.=20 23.When you are on an IBM, and when you turn it on, ask loudly where = the smiling Apple face is.=20 24.Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, then when its all done = (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line.=20 25.Sit and stare at the screen, biting your nails noisily. After doing = this for a while, spit them out at the feet of the person next to you.=20 26.Stare at the screen, grind your teeth, stop, look at the person next = to you, grinding. Repeat procedure, making sure you never provoke the = person enough to let them blow up, as this releases tension, and it is far more = effective to let them linger.=20 27.If you have long hair, take a typing break, look for split ends, cut = them and deposit them on your neighbor's keyboard as you leave.=20 28.Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on = your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you.=20 29.Come to the lab wearing several layers of socks. Remove shoes and = place them of top of the monitor. Remove socks layer by layer and drape = them around the monitor. Exclaim sudden haiku about the aesthetic beauty = of cotton on plastic.=20 30.Take the keyboard and sit under the computer. Type up your paper = like this. Then go to the lab supervisor and complain about the bad = working conditions.=20 31.Laugh hysterically, shout "You will all perish in flames!!!" and = continue working.=20 32.Bring some dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking.=20 33.Assign a musical note to every key (ie. the Delete key is A Flat, = the B key is F sharp, etc.). Whenever you hit a key, hum its note = loudly. Write an entire paper this way.=20 34.Attempt to eat your computer's mouse.=20 35.Borrow someone else's keyboard by reaching over, saying "Excuse me, = mind if I borrow this for a sec?", unplugging the keyboard & taking it.=20 36.Bring in a bunch of magnets and have fun.=20 37.When doing calculations, pull out an abacus and say that sometimes = the old ways are best.=20 38.Play Pong for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab.=20 39.Make a loud noise of hitting the same key over and over again until = you see that your neighbor is noticing (You can hit the space bar so = your fill isn't affected). Then look at your neighbor's keyboard. Hit his/her delete = key several times, erasing an entire word. While you do this, ask: "Does = *your* delete key work?" Shake your head, and resume hitting the space bar = on your keyboard. Keep doing this until you've deleted about a page of = your neighbor's document. Then, suddenly exclaim: "Well, whaddya know? = I've been hitting the space bar this whole time. No wonder it wasn't = deleting! Ha!" Print out your document and leave.=20 40.Remove your disk from the drive and hide it. Go to the lab monitor = and complain that your computer ate your disk. (For special effects, put = some Elmer's Glue on or around the disk drive. Claim that the computer is = drooling.)=20 41.Stare at the person's next to your's screen, look really puzzled, = burst out laughing, and say "You did that?" loudly. Keep laughing, grab = your stuff and leave, howling as you go.=20 42.Point at the screen. Chant in a made up language while making = elaborate hand gestures for a minute or two. Press return or the mouse, = then leap back and yell "COVEEEEERRRRRR!" peek up from under the table, walk back to = the computer and say. "Oh, good. It worked this time," and calmly start = to type again.=20 43.Keep looking at invisible bugs and trying to swat them.=20 44.See who's online. Send a total stranger a talk request. Talk to them = like you've known them all your lives. Hangup before they get a chance = to figure out you're a total stranger.=20 45.Bring an small tape player with a tape of really absurd sound = effects. Pretend it's the computer and look really lost.=20 46.Pull out a pencil. Start writing on the screen. Complain that the = lead doesn't work.=20 47.Come into the computer lab wearing several endangered species of = flowers in your hair. Smile incessantly. Type a sentence, then laugh = happily, exclaim "You're such a marvel!!", and kiss the screen. Repeat this after = every sentence. As your ecstasy mounts, also hug the keyboard. Finally, = hug your neighbor, then the computer assistant, and walk out.=20 48.Run into the computer lab, shout "Armageddon is here!!!!!", then = calmly sit down and begin to type.=20 49.Quietly walk into the computer lab with a Black and Decker chainsaw, = rev that baby up, and then walk up to the nearest person and say, "Give = me that computer or you'll be feeding my pet crocodile for the next week".=20 50.Two words: Tesla Coil.=20 Yours in mirth and world dominance, Ian MacLeod ------=_NextPart_000_0058_01C09836.3D8AB3D0 Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
Fellow Mad Scientists,
 
We've all been working too hard, now is = the time to=20 have some fun:
 
50 Ways To Confuse, Worry, Or Just = Scare People In=20 A Computer Lab
 
  1.Log on, wait a sec, then get a = frightened=20 look on your face and scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt. =
 =20 2.Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and = look=20 suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
  3.When your = computer is=20 turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can't get the damn = thing to=20 work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5
    = minutes,turn it=20 off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour.
  = 4.Type=20 frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evily. =
 =20 5.Before anyone else is in the lab, connect each computer to a different = screen=20 than the one it's set up with.
  6.Write a program that plays = the=20 "Smurfs" theme song and play it at the highest volume possible over = & over=20 again.
  7.Work normally for a while. Suddenly look amazingly = startled=20 by something on the screen and crawl underneath the desk.
  = 8.Ask the=20 person next to you if they know how to tap into top-secret Pentagon = files.=20
  9.Use Interactive Send to make passes at people you don't = know.=20
 10.Make a small ritual sacrifice to the computer before you = turn it=20 on.
 11.Bring a chainsaw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why = you have=20 it, say "Just in case..." mysteriously.
 12.Type on VAX for a = while.=20 Suddenly start cursing for 3 minutes at everything bad about your life. = Then=20 stop and continue typing.
 13.Enter the lab, undress, and start = staring=20 at other people as if they're crazy while typing.
 14.Light = candles in=20 a pentagram around your terminal before starting.
 15.Ask = around for a=20 spare disk. Offer $2. Keep asking until someone agrees. Then, pull a = disk out of=20 your fly and say, "Oops, I forgot."
 16.Every time you press = Return and=20 there is processing time required, pray = "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and=20 scream "YES!" when it finishes.
 17."DISK FIGHT!!!" =
 18.Start=20 making out with the person at the terminal next to you (It helps if you = know=20 them, but this is also a great way to make new friends). =
 19.Put a=20 straw in your mouth and put your hands in your pockets. Type by hitting = the keys=20 with the straw.
 20.If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin = around=20 singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time = required.=20
 21.Draw a pictue of a woman (or man) on a piece of paper, tape = it to=20 your monitor. Try to seduce it. Act like it hates you and then complain = loudly=20 that
    women (men) are worthless.
 22.Try = to stick=20 a Ninetendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disk drive. When it doesn't work, = get the=20 supervisor.
 23.When you are on an IBM, and when you turn it = on, ask=20 loudly where the smiling Apple face is.
 24.Print out the = complete=20 works of Shakespeare, then when its all done (two days later) say that = all you=20 wanted was one line.
 25.Sit and stare at the screen, biting = your nails=20 noisily. After doing this for a while, spit them out at the feet of the = person=20 next to you.
 26.Stare at the screen, grind your teeth, stop, = look at=20 the person next to you, grinding. Repeat procedure, making sure you = never=20 provoke the person enough
    to let them blow up, as = this=20 releases tension, and it is far more effective to let them linger.=20
 27.If you have long hair, take a typing break, look for split = ends,=20 cut them and deposit them on your neighbor's keyboard as you leave.=20
 28.Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal = Family on=20 your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you.
 29.Come to = the lab=20 wearing several layers of socks. Remove shoes and place them of top of = the=20 monitor. Remove socks layer by layer and drape = them
    around=20 the monitor. Exclaim sudden haiku about the aesthetic beauty of cotton = on=20 plastic.
 30.Take the keyboard and sit under the computer. Type = up your=20 paper like this. Then go to the lab supervisor and complain about the = bad=20 working
    conditions.
 31.Laugh = hysterically, shout=20 "You will all perish in flames!!!" and continue working. =
 32.Bring some=20 dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking. =
 33.Assign a=20 musical note to every key (ie. the Delete key is A Flat, the B key is F = sharp,=20 etc.). Whenever you hit a key, hum its note loudly. Write an=20 entire
    paper this way.
 34.Attempt to eat = your=20 computer's mouse.
 35.Borrow someone else's keyboard by = reaching over,=20 saying "Excuse me, mind if I borrow this for a sec?", unplugging the = keyboard=20 & taking it.
 36.Bring in a bunch of magnets and have fun.=20
 37.When doing calculations, pull out an abacus and say that = sometimes=20 the old ways are best.
 38.Play Pong for hours on the most = powerful=20 computer in the lab.
 39.Make a loud noise of hitting the same = key over=20 and over again until you see that your neighbor is noticing (You can hit = the=20 space bar so your fill isn't
    affected). Then look = at your=20 neighbor's keyboard. Hit his/her delete key several times, erasing an = entire=20 word. While you do this, ask: "Does *your*
    delete = key=20 work?" Shake your head, and resume hitting the space bar on your = keyboard. Keep=20 doing this until you've deleted about a page of = your
   =20 neighbor's document. Then, suddenly exclaim: "Well, whaddya know? I've = been=20 hitting the space bar this whole time. No wonder it wasn't=20 deleting!
    Ha!" Print out your document and leave.=20
 40.Remove your disk from the drive and hide it. Go to the lab = monitor=20 and complain that your computer ate your disk. (For special effects, put = some
    Elmer's Glue on or around the disk drive. = Claim that=20 the computer is drooling.)
 41.Stare at the person's next to = your's=20 screen, look really puzzled, burst out laughing, and say "You did that?" = loudly.=20 Keep laughing, grab your stuff and
    leave, howling = as you=20 go.
 42.Point at the screen. Chant in a made up language while = making=20 elaborate hand gestures for a minute or two. Press return or the mouse, = then=20 leap back and
    yell "COVEEEEERRRRRR!" peek up from = under=20 the table, walk back to the computer and say. "Oh, good. It worked this = time,"=20 and calmly start to type
    again.
 43.Keep = looking=20 at invisible bugs and trying to swat them.
 44.See who's = online. Send a=20 total stranger a talk request. Talk to them like you've known them all = your=20 lives. Hangup before they get a chance to figure = out
   =20 you're a total stranger.
 45.Bring an small tape player with a = tape of=20 really absurd sound effects. Pretend it's the computer and look really = lost.=20
 46.Pull out a pencil. Start writing on the screen. Complain = that the=20 lead doesn't work.
 47.Come into the computer lab wearing = several=20 endangered species of flowers in your hair. Smile incessantly. Type a = sentence,=20 then laugh happily, exclaim
    "You're such a = marvel!!", and=20 kiss the screen. Repeat this after every sentence. As your ecstasy = mounts, also=20 hug the keyboard. Finally, hug your
    neighbor, then = the=20 computer assistant, and walk out.
 48.Run into the computer = lab, shout=20 "Armageddon is here!!!!!", then calmly sit down and begin to type.=20
 49.Quietly walk into the computer lab with a Black and Decker=20 chainsaw, rev that baby up, and then walk up to the nearest person and = say,=20 "Give me that
    computer or you'll be feeding my pet = crocodile for the next week".
 50.Two words: Tesla Coil. =
 
Yours in mirth and world = dominance,
 
Ian MacLeod
 
 
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